When I first read St. Augustine’s popular book, Confessions, I did not see many ways in which this “antiquated” book could possibly be relevant to my life. Aside from further growing in the art of confession, the concept obviously derived from the title of the book, I feared that little would be left to learn. Fortunately, as I delved into the book rather hesitantly, I found to my delight that there are many truths to be derived from this classic work.
To begin, Confessions taught me that my presupposition of the work confession itself might have been slightly skewed. Confession to the Lord and to my fellow humans often becomes merely a list or an acknowledgement while completely ignoring the equally important aspects of true sorrow and repentance. The confessions of St. Augustine were very real – he made no attempt to justify the sins that were his own. This is another aspect in which I seek to grow. It is one thing to own to committing a sin; it is quite another to do so without making excuses or justifications.
While still unregenerate, Augustine’s search for truth was an all-consuming part of his life. This was a very convicting realisation for me as I examined the differences between his quest for truth and me for mine. Granted there is a rather stark contrast in the life situations which we find ourselves in: Augustine was born into a half-Christian home and was not raised with the Truth in the same way I have been. As one great teacher once told me, “It’s okay not to know, but it’s not okay to not know and be satisfied.” In other words, don’t be afraid to ask questions without knowing the answer, but don’t be satisfied in your ignorance. However there are ways in my life were I can see that I am content with not knowing, and this should not be so.
Perhaps one of the poignant ways St. Augustine has changed my life would be as an example of both sin and the effects thereof. I have meditated many times on the passage where he stated, “I was afraid that You would answer my prayer at once and cure me too soon of the disease of the lust, which I wanted satisfied, not quelled.” Unfortunately we as Christians are often caught in the state of the realisation of the fact that our sin must be dealt with but with the hesitation of dealing with that sin for fear of having our sinful desires left unfulfilled. Amid all this, though, is the joy that shines through we a transformed life is witnessed through the power of Christ working through a man to change his heart and his very desires.
Therefore, in my opinion, Confessions, though certainly very old, is hardly out-dated, for the truths and experiences are still very relevant to life today. The truths expressed in Confessions cannot change with time, for their Author does not change with time, and are consequently always relevant.